A mother fears the very child she's trying to help | My-sprinkle

Jacob was seven the first time he tried to kill his mother.

He grabbed a screwdriver and went for her. She dodged the dark-haired second-grader and tried to disarm him. He came at her again. When he realized he couldn?t stab her, the child threw the screwdriver straight at her.

?He?s very aggressive,? said his mom. ?He throws things. He broke my door. The last time, he came in with a piece of rebar and start swinging. I took my (two younger) sons into my bedroom and locked the door. I was afraid.?

We?re not using the family?s real names because this kid?s got enough trouble without being identified in a newspaper.

The mom has been trying to get help for her child for the three years since the first incident. He was prescribed Ritalin and then taken off it again. His elementary school contacted Child and Family Services and referred Jacob for help. Nothing came of that, she says. He was prescribed Concerta, a drug that treats attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). His mother says that made him hear voices.

?In school, he was getting into terrible fights all the time,? she says. She tried to get respite from CFS to give her time with her younger sons. The single mom says she feels trapped in her house.

She has received limited respite. her own mother helps, but she works full-time. A Family Services spokesman says even though a child is not in care, he or she can be referred to the Manitoba Adolescent Treatment Centre, children?s psychiatric services at Health Sciences Centre and other community supports. She says she?s been there, done that.

Winnipeg Regional Health Authority media relations director Heidi Graham spoke to the mom Wednesday. Graham says she apologized if the mom was unclear about any of the efforts made on her behalf.

?Our files show that there have been numerous contacts for a variety of reasons since May of 2011,? Graham wrote in an email. ?Since the May 2011 referral, many mental-health services and assessments have been provided as needed and the appropriate referrals made, including one hospital admission in June.? The WRHA has a file on the boy dating back to 2008.

He will be seen by the neurodevelopmental service in less than a week, Graham says. The mom says Graham?s files contradict some of her own.

She?s on social assistance. She has lined up a private psychiatrist to treat her child, not certain the WRHA will get him the help he needs. her mother has taken out a second mortgage on her Winnipeg house to pay for the therapy.

Jacob?s mother has had to make some tough choices to keep the 10-year-old, her other sons and herself safe. She pulled him from public school and enrolled him in a private school where they can give Jacob all the attention he needs. She uses her welfare money to pay for the tuition. She?s raising her sons on her child tax benefit.

In May, the mom called the province?s Youth Mobile Crisis Unit for help in dealing with his violence. She also called MATC Mental Health Services for Children, Youth & Families, but claims they refused to help because the crisis unit was already involved. The crisis unit kept him for two days to stabilize him. She requested help from CFS again and says she was refused. In June, Jacob was removed from the house and spent three days in the youth stabilization unit.

Shortly after, he was taken to the Children?s Hospital pysch ward and kept for 10 days.

?He?s not a bad person,? his mom says. ?He?s a very loving person. He cares about his brothers and me.?

Last month, the mom had to call police because Jacob was violent. The mobile crisis unit agreed to take him again.

?I feel like I?ve been failed by Child and Family and by MATC,? the mom says. ?I?m just terrified he?s going to end up dead or in jail.?

Jacob isn?t a bad seed. He?s a very sick boy whose mother can?t find him sustained help in any medical or social-services agency in this city.

The system says it?s helping. His mom says she?s afraid for her safety and that of her young sons. there may be all sorts of well-meaning people involved in his care, but until Jacob can be made whole, if he can be made whole, he?s a threat to himself and those who love him.

POSTSCRIPT: Earlier this week, I told you about blind piano tuner Val Wagner. He was robbed of his tuning tools while at a Portage Avenue Tim Hortons. A Free Press reader has offered Wagner a used set of tools.

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Source: http://www.my-sprinkle.com/a-mother-fears-the-very-child-shes-trying-to-help/

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